On putting yourself out there…

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I would say one of the hardest things (at least, for me) to deal with in a growing business has been facing what feels like a constant barrage of criticism (sometimes good, and sometimes not) and even ridicule.

Back when I first began my business Facebook page, the goal was to get as many people to see my posts as possible.

But around this time last year, I felt that begin to change for me. It started as just a little bit of hesitation. Should I post this about myself? Should I say this? What if someone doesn’t like this? 

I started telling myself to have ‘thicker skin’, when the negative or hateful comments started happening more often.

But then more recently, I started to find myself not posting on social media at all. I hadn’t posted on my public FB page in more than a month. Which – is downright stupid of me, considering that there are 75,000 people following me there, that I could be reaching with my business. But, I dreaded the thought of posting. I dreaded the thought of looking at the comments.

Most people are nice. But there are those ones who seem to be chomping at the bit to jump down my throat. And I felt myself closing up more and more. Wanting to stay hidden.

Then, over the last month, I realized this dread was beginning to bleed into my emailing. I had stopped sending emails. I hadn’t sent one in more than a month.

And, I realized this after I sent one out by accident. It went out to some people who had purchased a pattern from me sometime in the last year or two, and it thanked them for their purchase. (You might be wondering how you could send an email by accident. One word: Confusionsoft)

Within an hour of my accidental email, 2 former customers of my membership (who I’d removed for being total drama queens/troublemakers) had written me nasty replies. One said, “Purge your emails, you stupid woman!”  The other wrote an entire paragraph, ending in “Guess your new website isn’t working out so well, is it????” (I think I heard a cackle through the computer screen!)

And that was when it hit me.

These were the kind of people I was letting tear me down. These were the kind of people I’ve been afraid of.

The kind of people who sit around waiting for you to mess up. Who laugh when you do. The kind of people who laugh when you mess up, while they sit behind a screen, not doing a thing themselves.

I have messed up, said something ‘not that bright’, misspelled a word, sent an accidental email and really pissed a few people off… I’ve done all of those things and a whole lot more.

And now I know.. the ones judging me the worst, are the ones who wouldn’t even dare try.

So, today, I posted on Facebook. A tiny step in starting to put myself out there again.

 

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